Fraud
'Twas a nice normal day. Until the phone rang.
It was the fraud department at the bank.
"We are calling as a part of a routine fraud investigation. Can we please verify some of your recent transactions?"
Nothing out of the ordinary about this - it has happened a few times befow. My main concern was the fact that I was dying for the toilet and trying not to move my feet and disturb the slumbering Charlie.
"Did you place an order with Amazon fifteen minutes ago for £1500?"
What the fuck?! Not in my wildest dreams.
"No. AARRRGGGHHHHH!"
"Don't worry, the transaction was declined"
Great. People are trying to clean out my account and I shouldnt' worry because the bank declined it.
"Did you spend £700 at an American electronic store at around midnight?"
"NO! I live in the UK and I just got in from work, you freak. Planes just don't travel fast enough to make that possible"
"OK. Well, that one has gone through. We'll freeze your card and hopefully that will stop it." She sounds so cheerful and matter of fact that I would punch her, if she wasn't calling from a call centre in Glasgow.
"And if it doesn't?"
"Well, then there will be an investigation. As it is fraud the money will be refunded in a couple of days after the investigation". Still so cheerful. Not her bloody money, that's why.
As an afterthought....
"I'm guessing that you also didn't spend £750 in a US car bodyshop last night then? That one was declined too as it was the third attempt on your card in five minutes."
"Oh joy"
So. I have just been paid. I can't access my money as the card has been frozen. I can't get to a branch as I have to work (for money I can't bloody access), and some little shit with an entitlement complex and a phobia of real work has tried to empty my account of its hard earned funds. Fucking wankers.
I'm going back to Limp Bizkit. "Give me something to break; how 'bout your fucking face?". Dedicated to the workshy thieving fuckers of the world. May red hot pokers be shoved up your rectums.
posted by DMouse007 @ 2/25/2004 06:13:00 PM
<< Home